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Preheat the oven to 350°F. Beat the 6 eggs + 2 cups of sugar until they double in size. Separately, sift the flour + 3 tsp baking powder + a pinch of salt. Add the sifted flour over the beaten yolks. Add ½ cup of fresh milk + ½ tsp of vanilla. Mix with a wire whisk clockwise, working in plenty of air. Finish with a mixer for a few seconds. Pour into the mold. 1 hour in the oven at 180°C / 350°F. Don't open the oven, just set a timer. It's ready when a toothpick comes out clean.
In a large pot: 2 condensed milks + heavy cream + coconut milk + 2 evaporated milks + ¼ cup of rum. Over medium heat, stirring constantly – the condensed milk is heavier, sinks to the bottom, and burns if you don't stir it. Warm it through, do not boil – if it boils, the cream curdles and releases fat.
A pot with 1½ cups of sugar + 1 cup of port. High heat until it boils, then lower to medium so it doesn't boil over. Don't stir, just let it boil. When it's ready, pour it into a measuring cup so the temperature drops a little (if it's boiling when you add it to the egg whites, they seize up).
The sponge has to be COLD, the milks HOT. If you soak the cake while warm, it all sinks and ends up like a deflated mattress. Prick the cold sponge with a stick all over, fearlessly, lots of little holes. With a ladle, soak it with the warm milks. Keep soaking until it won't take any more. Save whatever is left over in a small jug in case you need to moisten it the next day.
Beat ½ cup of egg whites in a clean, dry bowl to stiff peaks. While beating, add the hot syrup in a thin stream – the hot syrup draws the water out of the whites and "cooks" them. It's done when the bowl is cool to the touch.